Thursday, November 22, 2007

It wouldn't be the holidays without a little...

Sometimes I wish I had one of those families that gets completely drunk at Christmas. And sometimes I wish I had one of those families that was so dysfunctional that I would have enough emotional trauma to write a book or be an edgy singer/songwriter. Alas, my family is pretty normal. Well, my immediate family is pretty normal. There isn't any drama. There aren't any knock down, drag out fights. We, for the most part, get along. What the hell kind of holiday season am I being subjected to?? Happiness? Joy? Peace on fucking earth??

I wish I had something good to write about. Like that my mom got so drunk and downed so many anti-depressants that she started a karaoke bar in our living room and sold tickets for her show to the people talking a holiday walk along the path that runs next the the picturesque creek by our cozy cookie cutter house in suburbia right across the way from the elementary school I attended for seven years and the park in which I played when I was young. Crap. My run-on sentence doesn't even work because it just segues into how picture-perfect my childhood was. Damn-it, I can't even make my mom a crazy drunk lounge lizard! It just doesn't work! I just don't have enough dysfunction to even pretend to have dysfunction. I hate to admit it, but I don't really have any major life-changing family crap or life crap to shape me into one of those people with "issues." And I ask you, where are my issues?? Everyone is supposed to have them, so where are mine?

Well, Ok, let's face it, my parents are still together AND they get along, my grandparents are all still together. My grandmother on my dad's side died when I was 12 but my grandfather has never remarried. With the exception of two aunts, all my aunts and uncles and cousins are still married to their first marriage partner. No one has committed suidide or attempted it. No one is "the drunk" at gatherings. We don't hate anyone in the family and we actually like hanging out with each other. Hmm I think this is abuse. How does my family expect me to doubt love and relationships, drink my insecurities away, and never have any self-esteem or ambition unless I get a little suppression in my life. For the love of God can't I get some true American normalcy?

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

The Shaggs Review

The Shaggs all girl band plays like it has twelve different sheets of music, everyone is playing, no one is leading, and everyone has started at a different time. They purposefully play their music a little bit off balance. It makes the listener unable to follow and unable to catch up.

They are playing as if they are running the race of the turtle and the hare. Half the band is the turtle and the other half is the hare. Their album is the entire race. The percussion stays on beat, they are the constant, ever persistent turtle and the vocalist and other instrumentalists are the hare. They start and stop without any constant rhythm.

The lyrics are so non-scensical that the band channels a 2-year old that is learning to walk and talk at the same time. You can’t do it all at once without stumbling.

Despite all the weird nuances of their music, they are doing something original. They are experimenting with sound and rhythm to produce an audience reaction. I would love to see them in concert at a Berkeley coffee shop.

The band Pastel Pasta was an experimental group that started at my high school. They also experimented with ridiculous lyrics and obscure instruments like the toy piano and a washboard. They entered the Battle of the Bands one year and got about last place. The next year they received second place because of their creativity in performance execution and lyrics that people could laugh at.

The Shaggs do the same thing. It is still entertainment, the listener just needs to go in with an open mind, laugh and have fun listening to something new.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

I am Jack's Clever Blog Title

Up until last weekend I had never seen Fight Club. Oh wow it is amazing and I am going to marry Edward Norton. But that isn't the point. The point is, that after seeing fight club, my junior year in high school finally makes sense. This cartoon was the focus of many many laughs and fun times. My friends and I were geeks, but then again, who wasn't a geek in high school? Enjoy my reminiscence with my buddies Jamal, Billy and Oscar.


Monday, October 22, 2007

Influences

So there is this artist named Phil Hansen who does some incredible work that is completely unconventional. This is a series of paintings he did on his stomach. Instead of doing each one separately he painted them on top of one another. Each painting was about someone in his life that had influenced him in some way. Once he was finished he peeled off the solid layer of paint and made a self portrait. Watch this video. It is amazing!




It makes me wonder who I would paint if I were to share my influences with the world. There are artists and authors and celebrities and other people I have never met. I think, in the end, the people who have influenced me most have been my friends and family. I guess that is a no brainer. But when people are spending more and more time online on YouTube and other sites commenting on blogs for people they've never met, are our own influences shrinking or growing? Are we losing true friendships and replacing them with each other's computer alter egos? Phil Hansen has now influenced me but how long will it last? Probably not nearly as long as if I had seen his work in real life. So thanks Phil for the amusing Monday. We'll see who will be my entertainment tomorrow.

30 Days of Night

So I figured I would take one for the team and go with my silly friends to see a crappy vampire flick. They thought I didn't like scary movies because they scared me. However, scary movies may make me jump but usually I end up talking and laughing through all of them because they are so ridiculous. Luckily, Colleen didn't give me too much shit and Drew didn't mind my mockery of him and the film.

The one redeeming quality of the movie for me was, of course, Josh Hartnett. He is not that bad of an actor. And he is nice to look at. In the beginning he was clean shaven and looked like a member of a boy band. But then by "day 7" he had the really hot scruff thing going for him. It was wonderful.

What was not wonderful was the stupid blond girl, Stella. First of all "Stella" is not the name of a blond white girl. Second, her hair was way too perfect throughout the entire film. Her one redeeming quality was that she didn't whine and didn't break her ankle. In the end, she still makes a stupid decision. I won't give it away but in the theater it was one of those "oh come on!" moments.

All in all, Drew said it right, "It was pretty good as far as vampire movies go."

I'm sorry but this is just laughable!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

I Saw Dead People

It is not everyday that an average student gets to spend time with dead people, unless, of course, you are a student on the fast track to medical school. However, for those normal majors like journalism and glass blowing, this is not a run-of-the-mill occurrence. Now, for a limited time, all of you average people out there can experience death first hand! No, no, no one is going on a killing spree. Body Worlds 2 is now showing at the Tech Museum in downtown San Jose. It is a world famous exhibit created by a bunch of scientists, doctors and artists who got together one day and said, "Hey, let's plastinate some dead bodies and put them in action poses around the world." Sounds awesome!

All jokes aside it really is amazing. It absolutely blew my mind that each and every person at the exhibit tonight knew the plastic people were, at one time, real people. They knew that these people died and donated their bodies to this exhibit. Even though each person knew they were in a room with dozens of dead guys, they still paid $20 to be there. Ordinary citizens do not pay money to go visit dead bodies in the coroner's office. Ordinary people do not watch surgeries at hospitals just to see a person's insides. Why then would people be attracted to something as gruesome as death so up close and personal? Why? Because it is art.

The question "What is art?" is so trivial because there are so many interpretations of the word. To some people it is foreign and consists only of things learned in grade school like Van Gogh's Starry Night or Egyptian hieroglyphics. To others art is something for only "those weird people" who sit around all day with berets on their heads reciting poetry and painting on canvas. Yes, each person is different but art lies in the eye of the beholder and in the mind of the artist.

An article by Christopher Bollen about an artist named Keith Edmier who wanted to recreate an exact replica of his 1970s childhood home. Using only his memory and old photographs he was able to create this clone of a home where he used to live. Is this art? If something is reproduced exactly as it was originally, is it art? If exact replicas of human bodies are made or if the bodies are plasticized and put on display does that make it art? After seeing tonight's presentation, I can say yes, it does.

At the beginning of the exhibit, everything was straightforward and scientific. As I moved on, the displays became more and more ambiguous and artistic. One piece in the exhibit called "the Drawer Man" was a man who had had chunks of his body cut and pulled out like drawers. Not only were there just chunks of flesh hanging out, but pieces of him had been dissected to show only the bone layer, or the muscles or the nerves. In some places his original skin still remained. When looked at closely we could still see the hair on his head, legs and armpits. With all his drawers hanging out it was like looking up at one of those children's puzzles that teaches shapes. The circle shape has to go into the circle hole and the square shape has to go into the square hole. He had been pieced together in such a way that it became art. It was beautiful.

Another work of art was a man who had been cut vertically into thin pieces of tissue. He too, had been dissected to reveal certain parts of his body structure. Each thin layer was then placed side by side. Though the pieces could not be touched it was like looking though the poster rack at a record store. Each flap revealed a different story about the old man's life. It makes you wonder what that man was like and how he ended up donating his body to science.

There are dozens of more things I could mention about this exhibit but I don't want to spoil any surprises. There is one room that you should not miss when you go. You will know which one it is once you are in it and you will leave wishing you hadn't gone to it. However, it impacts everyone and it impacts how you view the rest of the presentation. So enjoy! Hooray science! Hooray art! Who says the two cannot be interchangeable?

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Wincing the Night Away

The Shins

The Shins, without your knowledge, has hypnotized you, put you to sleep, and has taken you away to its secret, dream world. You do not have a say in this matter. You have been hooked and now must follow them.

Wincing the Night Away is the alternative band, The Shins’ third album. It begins with one haunting, echoing voice and eerie drumbeats. Slowly more percussion and obscure noises are added to the first track. The rest of the band joins in halfway through with guitar, bass and other instruments. The journey has begun.

The tempo of the song, like the listener’s heartbeat, transforms with each passing measure. Changing from minor chords in the beginning to major chords toward the end heightens the sense of mystery and awe. Lullaby slow in the beginning segues into a tense, anxiety filled adventure taken only by dreamers. Finally, you arrive at the end of the song with the glorious pounding of a rock concert. Tons of rowdy, screaming fans greet you and beckon to you join them.

This first song is called Sleeping Lessons for a reason. The “lullaby” in the beginning is no accident. The Shins teach you to sleep, to dream and make you travel through the endless abyss until you arrive in dreamland. Once you are there, the only way to introduce you to this new land is with the song Australia.

It starts with, “La la la la,” and not a care in the world. In standard time, lively percussion keeps the beat. Nonsense lyrics and messages of pain and depression mix with the campy happiness of the music. Just like a dreamer, you must decode what you see and hear in order to survive.

Underneath all the confusing images and random firings in your brain, dreams can be insightful. In this song, The Shins sing about dodo birds and androids but also about life when you aren’t dreaming. “Your nightmares only need a year or two to unfold,” truly makes the listener think.

The Shins ask you some hard questions. Are your dreams better than reality? Is your reality actually a nightmare? After asking their listeners to come with them and jump out the window, the song ends with a mocking, “La la la la.” You are left feeling numb and your head hurts like you have come out of REM sleep too quickly.

The rest of their songs are as silly and haphazard as actual dreams. For example, the songs Sea Legs, Girl Sailor, Red Rabbits and their first single Phantom Limb all convey images of dreams we have all had. Phantom Limb begins with a perky tambourine and the same soothing voice as the first song. It is like you are floating through this dream world without want or need to go back to reality. Phantom Limb leads into Sea Legs and your body becomes jello. The drawn out phrases give the feeling of seasickness and floating on the water.

The Shins’ lyrics to these songs are unrecognizable so you must listen the way the words sound with the music, not the actual meaning of the words. The physical album comes with the lyrics printed in the pullout guide. These lyrics are sometimes nonsensical but you get an insight you never knew you were searching for.

At the end of the album, the song A Comet Appears wakes you up with morning bird calls and slide guitar. The peaceful notes whisper, “Good morning.” Regretfully, the dream is over and what might have been a restful sleep was actually riddled with strange characters and breathtaking adventures. This musical, dream-like journey is so fascinating that all you want to do is sleep forever. Thankfully, all you have to do is click the repeat button on your iTunes to enjoy it all over again. Sweet Dreams.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Why are Girls So Mean?

Today a friend of mine disclosed some shocking information. In this guy's 21 years of life, seven out of seven "serious relationships" have ended because the female has cheated on him. That is 100 percent! This information completely floored me because this guy is not a schmuck. I could understand cheating on a guy who was a schmuck. However, this one is actually the opposite of a schmuck (I like the word 'schmuck' can you tell?). He is quite chivalrous (buys us pizza and beer), has an incredible sense of humor and will one day have a huge collection of really nice cars. What more could you ask for? Maybe someone nice to look at...oh wait, he is.

So what is the deal ladies? I understand the
wanting to cheat part of the equation but the actual cheating is a little hard for me to understand. Yes, everyone should have their fantasies and their crushes at work or school but acting upon it is a different story. I firmly believe that if I were dead set on acting upon any feelings outside of my relationship, I would break away from the relationship first. I would, at the very least, talk about it. Maybe I am just blinded by my own successful relationships to see the point of view of others in different situations.

My roommate told me she cheated once. She cheated on her boyfriend with a mutual friend in another city. Once and only once she cheated and she regrets it until this day. She got nothing out of it. She vowed never to do it again and she never has. But she paid for it over and over. He friends treated her differently. Her boyfriend, who she eventually got back together with, never trusted her ever again. He never really got over it and was always overprotective of the time she spent away from him. Disclaimer: they recently broke up (again)...(for good). Lesson: cheating will tear down anything you have taken the time to build up.

I think, for the most part, I am haunted by the phrase, "once a cheater, always a cheater." My biggest fear is that, at some point in my life, I will cheat and then I will become "that girl." "Megan is the girl who cheats" will be sung across the land and everyone will label me an awful person. I would lose all my credibility as a girlfriend and as a friend. Saying "sorry" just doesn't cut it and, "I cheated on you" can never be taken back.